Can You Help Me With My Confidence?

For some people it seems confidence comes naturally. You can probably see this person now…they walk into a room, they know the right things to say, and nothing seems to rattle them. It’s almost as if they’ve been there before, that’s the level of confidence they radiate. Is this by chance? What is confidence? Is it a skill? I just asked a lot of questions that need answers.

If you’ve ever struggled with confidence, my goal is to help you.

Confidence is self-belief with preparation. It’s the ability to navigate challenges and achieve your goals despite uncertainty. They key components to this being self-assurance, resilience, and growth.

Is confidence a skill? I do believe that confidence is a skill, and like anything else, you have to practice it. With over 15 years of experience in higher education, athletics, and leadership research, I truly believe that confidence is something you build through intentional preparation and action. It’s true, for some people other things can impact their natural inclination toward confidence, but for most it comes from mindset, experiences, and effort.

For starters, you need to have a level of self-awareness. One of my favorite exercises for people to do is to ask 3 people that you have a great relationship with, ‘what are my strengths and weaknesses?’ My guess is, you’ll be surprised by the answers. To grow in your confidence, you need to know yourself. Your perception of yourself is most likely different than the way the world receives you. Having an understanding of this already elevates your level of consciousness.

When you were in high school, did you ever receive a pop quiz? I will never forget the level of panic that would raise in my body when I would hear the teacher say, ‘put everything away we’re having a pop quiz today.’ But here’s the thing, the thought of the quiz was almost always the worst part. If you came to class and followed along with the material, at minimum you could pass. In life and within our careers we don’t want to barely pass, we want to elevate! However, there are seasons I’m sure where it can feel like pop quiz after pop quiz. A challenge comes out of nowhere or your day takes an unexpected turn, but being well-prepared in what you do and who you are increases your confidence. Preparation is such a huge part of confidence. Can you prepare for the unknown? Well…no. However, you can prepare to be your best and you must first create a routine of what that looks like for you and find ways to reach that on a daily basis.

Over the next couple of weeks, try to focus on your preparation. Whether it’s for a presentation, a routine you already have, or something new, I would love for you to try it out. When you’re well-prepared, you’ll feel more capable because you’ve done the work. Keep growing and as always, I am wishing you the best.